Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.
2018…how do I feel about you?
I know you’re not the “real” new year (the biblical one is in the Spring) and I’m not one for New Year’s Eve reflections. But I’m feeling like it this year.
I didn’t want to like you. In fact, I entered this year with the weight of blame, some shame, and hurt. 2016 really bruised me, 2017 gave me a limp, then beat me with my crutches. My faith took a hit. I lost some confidence. I nearly gave up.
I was crawling when I met you. But I’m leaving you…running.
2 Timothy 4:7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.
Philippians 3:14 I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
I have a fight to attend, a faith to keep, and a race to win. I am pressing on. You served a purpose. You brought much healing, growth, refining, and most importantly….hope.
My hope was restored.
I learned what I truly need and what I want. And what I don’t. I learned that it’s ok to be me, as long as I’m growing and seeking. Yesterday’s choices don’t fit with what I’ve learned. The same ol’ brings me the same ol’. I need to be different and do different to heal. To mature. To emulate my Savior.
In previous years I had a lengthy, detailed idea of what my life should be. It was complicated. At times slightly confusing. There were doubts. Fears. Questions.
I’m leaving that mess of a list with you. I have conquered my giants. My healing is 100% my responsibility and I owned it. I’m getting there.
I’ve read this hundreds of times and it’s moved me before. But not like this.
To live is Christ.
And I want to live.
Welcome 2019. May you be the best year yet.